Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
