i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
