My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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