PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
