If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
