Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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