So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize