Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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