I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
