i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
