You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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