He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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