sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize