Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Randomize
