what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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