Just fell off a train. Bad.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize