Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Randomize
