When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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