Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
