I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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