im gay
i know
yea but for you.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize