She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
they're like a gay fantastic four
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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