this beer tastes like vomit already
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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