But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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