I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
