I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I have already put on my inside pants.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
