In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
as a side note pls kill me
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize