we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
