Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
vagina is talking i cant
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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