just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
