We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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