when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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