woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
