The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize