Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
