Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
