Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
