i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
