i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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