Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Randomize
