dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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