your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
