i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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