she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
