who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize