I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
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