Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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