Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Randomize