what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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