As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
