Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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